April 24, 2011

Live, from New York it’s Cheeseburger Saturday Night. Starring my apartment with a special appearance from the Food Emporium in Union Square and featuring the Ready for Prime Beef Player, Marty Wombacher. And now, please welcome, my apartment!

I thought I'd stay home tonight and make a cheeseburger from home. Tomorrow's a big day at the Mars Bar, so I decided to stay home. But we have to go get ingredients so it's off to the Food Emporium we go. And now...Fruit! From the Farmer's Market on 14th Street.

Regular tomatoes are $1.99. I wonder how much the irregular ones are? They usually taste better.

Holy shitballs, they're selling computers here for 99 cents! I wonder how much the iPickle is going for?

Union Square Park is a little lively as it's finally starting to warm up a little.

And here we are at the Food Emporium to get our ingredients for tonight's homemade cheeseburger.

Bananas!

Check this out.

It's a scale for customers to use.

So you have to climb up on this thing to weigh yourself? And you'd fall right over yourself trying to read the results. This thing is a lawsuit waiting to happen!

Okay, all the ingredients are in place, back to my apartment to make tonight's Saturday Night Cheeseburger.

And here's the ingredients for tonight's cheeseburger meal. From left, red chili popcorn, ground sirloin, Jerk Sauce (yes, I bought it just so I could type in the words, "Jerk Sauce"), A.1. Sauce and in the front a Kaiser roll and WisPride Sharp Cheddar cheese spread. Everything one could want for a cheeseburger meal.

And the background music is my favorite Rolling Stones album, "Beggars Banquet." I added a little graffiti, see if you can find it.

Here's the burger seasoned with pepper, hot curry powder and a liberal dose of mustard powder.

I made a marinade of the A.1. Sauce, Jerk Sauce (Jerk Sauce!) and a dollop of Italian dressing. We'll let that sit in the fridge for about a half an hour and have a beer or three.

Okay, a half an hour and four beers (burp) later, here's the burger cooking in my electric skillet.

I applied a couple of mountains of the WisPride cheese spread and covered to let it melt.

And here it is in all its melted glory. Holy smokes, its grown cheese tits!

I cut the Kaiser roll in half and spread cheese on them put them in the toaster oven. Okay, time to put this all together.

And here it is, in all its cheesey glory, tonight's cheeseburger.

And here's the entire meal, plated with the red chili popcorn.

A great burger, if I do say so myself and I just did, so there! And what did I watch while eating this feast?

Fugitive Girls! It came in the mail today, look for it next Friday night. Goodnight and see you all tomorrow after dark.

My Meal
This is the best cheeseburger I have ever made and it was inspired by the cheeseburger I had at Whitman’s. Mine wasn’t quite as good, so Whitman’s is still the one to beat. The popcorn went well with the burger and there is no finer movie to watch while eating a cheeseburger, some popcorn and a beer than Fugitive Girls!

Cheeseburger Rating: Three Wimpy’s

Further reading: Food in Mouth, cooks.com, Cheese-Burger.net and Homemade Vs. McDonalds.

You might also like: Fuzzy Vodka, Fuzzy Duffy Bags and Fuzzy’s Taco.

Five Cheese Jesus’s
Cheese Jesus on Uncyclepedia
Grilled Cheese Jesus
Three Cheese Jesus Pizza
Cheese Toast Jesus
Cheeto Jesus

We ain’t got no friends,
Our troubles never end,
No business cards to send,
Daddy likes men.

ARCHIVES

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Bonus Photos!

We've been on a swizzle stick kick here, inspired by a post at Jeremiah's Vanishing New York a few days ago. Yesterday, Grade "A" Karen sent in some photos of some swizzle sticks from the collection she and Jon have over at the Grade "A" Fancy publishing and cocktail compound. Check these out!