Entries from May 1, 2011 - May 31, 2011


May 31, 2011

I had a big day yesterday and put up a huge post. It took me over two hours to do, so today, since it’s a holiday, I thought I’d take it easy. I was going to go somewhere and get something to eat, but since it’s Memorial Day, I thought I’d have a cookout. I was out all day yesterday, so I’ve decided to have an indoor cookout. I’ve got the indoors, all I need now is something to cook. To the Food Emporium!

And through the magic of the internet, here we are.

And, again, through the magic of the internet, you're spared the shopping experience and get to gaze at this pretty woman who rang me up.

It's warm out tonight and the streets are still somewhat deserted, thanks to the holiday weekend.

Here's the inside of Union Square Park. I'm so happy summer's finally here!

Now it's time to show you the ingredients for tonight's meal. First off, I thought I'd have an appetizer and for that I got some shaved ham slices, Genoa salami, Italian crackers and Velveeta cheese.

For the main course, I decided I would make my own version of a Sloppy Joe. So I got two ground beef patties that have cheese and bacon mixed in with them, and for the sauce I got Stubbs Barbecue sauce, spicy mustard, A-1 Sauce and Italian dressing. In the bag is a fresh croissant. Let's get cooking!

But first...

Let's uncork a beer! I think I'll have the giant Budweiser.

Okay, first we'll brown the ground beef. I've also seasoned it with pepper and Coleman's mustard powder.

Okay, now I've added all the sauces and mustard and poured a splash of beer to turn the beef into a Sloppy Joe mixture. And by God it does look sloppy!

We'll cover it up and just let it simmer for a while.

Okay, while that simmers, I'm going to have the appetizer. It's a simple one, I just stacked Velveeta cheese, Genoa salami and ham on top of four Italian crackers and added a dollop of the spicy mustard to each one. (Sorry, Kari!)

Here's a fuzzy shot of it, delicious and went well with the giant beer!

Okay, three beers later and everything's ready! The Sloppy Joe mixture smells great!

For a twist, instead of a hamburger bun, I sliced a croissant in half and covered them with Velveeta cheese and toasted them.

And here's the finished product. Oh look, they're spooning, how cute! It was delicious if I do say so myself and I just did, so there! Hope you all had a nice Memorial Day, now I have to get ready for work. Ecch! Goodnight everybody and see you tomorrow after dark.

Further reading and listening: Home Alone, Home Cooking, Home on the Range and Little House on the Prairie.

You might also like: Pickle Juice, Pickles and Juice.

Three Other Sloppy Joes
Joey Buttafuoco
Kangaroo Joey

I'll build a bonfire of my dreams,
And burn a broken effigy of me and you.


(Surprise link...click on it...I dare you!)


May 29, 2011

It’s opening weekend at Coney Island, so what am I doing sitting here writing this? Let’s start this adventure already!

**********UPDATE: The date should be MAY 30th, 2011, but I forgot to flip my calendar and it felt like Sunday today! I can't change it or it will fuck up anybody who has linked to it, so just pretend like that says May 30th up there! Happy Memorial day!

Special guest star for today is Shawn Chittle. Shawn's a photographer, documentarian, pilot and fellow EV Grieve commenter. Read more about Shawn and check out his blog here—Shawn Chittle Blog. We had a couple beers at my place before heading out, I didn't make any of my legendary snack mix because I didn't want to fill up before we got to Coney Island.

And through the magic of the internet you're spared the agonizing subway ride that no one will take once they rip Coney Island up next year and put in sports bars and high end restaurants on the boardwalk.

And away we go!

We're not even out of the subway and the action is happening already! Shawn noticed that legendary East Village musician David Peel was walking past us. Here's a shot of David and fellow musician Sean Yox.

Shawn, David Peel and Yours Fooly. Have a marijuana, everybody!

And here we are, Coney Island! First stop...

Ruby's Bar! Last November I never thought I'd be walking in here again!

And the beautiful Kara behind the bar was quick with a beer and a lovely smile.

They had a good crowd, I hope this keeps up all season!

A view of Ruby's from where Shawn and I were seated.

It was good to see Mike, who I met on the bar crawl last year.

Classic photos on the wall.

Here's a poster for the this year's Mermaid Parade on June 24th. Update: I just got an email from Tricia at Amusing The Zillion and this is an old poster, the Mermaid Parade this year is scheduled for June 18th. Thanks, Tricia!

This sailor was making the most of Fleet Week at Ruby's!

Nighttime sets on Ruby's bar and Shawn and  I decided to get something to eat.

And so it's off to the boardwalk we go!

I have to have a corn dog when I come out here, it's just part of the rules.

And they've got plenty cooked up!

I got a corn dog, a beer and a great smile from this friendly woman behind the counter. It's all smiles at Coney Island, one of the things I love about the place.


After eating, Shawn and I decided to wander around the park and take some photos. Mine are below and check out Shawn's photos and his flickr set from the night in the Bonus Photos at the end of the post.

We decided to have a nightcap at Cha Cha's.

This lovely lady was serving up daiquiris in the hut at the front of the bar. See what I mean about the smiles out here? Beautiful!

Here's Tony who was taking the cover charge of five dollars to get in. But you get a ticket for five bucks off your first drink, so everything's even Steven in here.

The bar at Cha Cha's.

Sip ahoy! (Patented catch-phrase courtesy of Uncle Waltie!)

A view from the back of the bar.

A neon-reflected photo on the wall.

Dueling photos!

Okay, time to call it a night...

After a pit stop at Nathan's!

What's so funny about peace, love and...

A cheese dog with a giganzo 32-ounce beer?

Shawn and I decided to split a car service to get back to the city. The driver let Shawn off in the East Village and I asked him to take me to the corner of 6th and 16th street and then made the sad mistake of closing my eyes and halfway passing out. I woke up and found out we were in Times Square. I asked the driver what the fuck was going on and I swear to God he was almost crying and said, "I don't know, I'm very lost!" I had to direct him to the corner of 6th and 16th Street. He's probably still out there trying to find his way home! Goodnight everybody and see you tomorrow after dark.

Ruby’s Coney Island Bar & Grill
1213 Riegelmann Boardwalk (Near 12th St.)

Cha Cha’s
1229 Riegelmann Boardwalk (@Stillwell Avenue)

Further reading: Amusing the Zillion, Jeremiah’s Vanishing New York, EV Grieve and 365 Bars.

You might also like: XTC, XYZ and XTZ.

Four Other Coney’s

Coney Dog
Coney Dog Sauce
Coney Detroit
Malachy Coney

From the park you'll hear the happy sound of a carousel,
You can almost taste the hot dogs and french fries they sell.


(Surprise link...click on it...I dare you!)

Bonus Photos From Shawn Chittle!
Shawn sent me some of his photos from last night and he got some fantastic shots. Check out some highlights below and then check out the whole set at his flickr page here: Shawn Chittle on flickr.


Late Post Today

Today's post will be up later than usual as I'm just waking up and have tons of photos from Coney Island to sort through for today's post. Yes, today will be a Coney Island post! So check back around 3pm and it should be up. Now I'm going to get a diet Mountain Dew and get to work! Happy Memorial Day, enjoy this Joan Jett video till my post is up!


May 29, 2011

Live, from New York, it’s Cheeseburger Saturday Night! Starring Burger & Barrel and featuring the ready for prime beef player, Marty Wombacher. Ladies and gentlemen...Burger & Barrel!

(But first a word from our sponsor)

(We now return to our broadcast, already in progress.)

And we're off. It's a holiday weekend and the city's quieter than usual. I love three day weekends in New York!

We're taking a cab there. I read some frightening subway news over at EV Grieve!

And here we are at the Burger & Barrel, looks nice, let's go inside.

Wow, nice and dark inside, I think Al would like this place.

And the lovely and friendly Emma serves up a can of Porkslap Ale.

Some of the lit up bottles behind the bar.

They have beer and a full bar, but this place is known for its wine selection. Bottles line the wall around the bar.

The view from my perch at the bar.

Some of the specials are listed on a chalkboard on a wall opposite the bar.

My beer illuminated by...FIRE!

And now for a look at the menu. Emma suggested I try the Bash Burger, so that's exactly what I ordered. It comes with Tater Tots!

Emma places the order and through the magic of this thing called the internet...

Here it is in all its glory! It's a giant burger, topped with two onion rings. And it comes with Tater Tots!

Burp! It was delicious, right up there with the Juicy Lucy!

Obligatory bathroom mirror shot! Goodnight everybody and see you tomorrow after dark.

My Meal
They have several styles of burgers at Burger & Barrel but Emma suggested the Bash Burger which is a burger with carmelized onions, bacon jam, pickles and cheese. Yeah, you read right, bacon jam! It was delcious and while it wasn’t better than Whitman’s Juicy Lucy, it was just as good. So for now the B&B’s Bash Burger and Whitman’s Juicy Lucy top the burger list here at MAD. Oh and the Tater Tots were excellent as well!

Cheeseburger Rating
Four Wimpy’s, and that’s as good as it gets!

Burger & Barrel
25 W. Houston St. (Near Mercer St.)

Further reading: NY Eater, Daily Candy, The Feast and Smoking Hot Waitress.

You might also like: Shirley Manson, Marilyn Manson and Charlie Manson.

Four Cheesy Things
Pickup Lines

I've got my pills to ease the pain,
Can't find a thing to ease the rain.


(Surprise link...click on it...I dare you!)

Bonus photo
MAD commenter and one third of the BBC, Gene Rubbico spotted a vanishing species at the bar, Down the Hatch in Locust Point, MD. He captured a shot of the ever-elusive cigarette machine and sent it in. Great shot, thanks Gene!


May 28, 2009

Okay, for once work wasn’t that bad today and I’ve got a three day weekend to look forward to, so I’m in a pretty good mood and just feel like taking it easy tonight. I haven’t screened a movie in quite a while here at MAD, so tonight I’m going to have a midnight movie showing of the long-awaited “Fugitive Girls.”

A month or so ago I wrote about this film, but if you didn’t read it or don’t remember, it’s the last movie legendary filmmaker Ed Wood was involved in. He co-wrote the movie with AC Stephens (Stephen Apostolof), who directed it. Ed Wood was the Assistant Director, using the name, Dick Trent as a pseudonym. It came out in 1974, and although I’ve played the movie trailer here before, it’s worth watching one more time before I screen it, check it out.

“Betrayed by her Lover ... Pimp Killer ... Dope Smuggler ... Bank Embezzler ... Lesbian—Leader of the Pack!”

Oh and this film has no subtitles, but I think that every picture will tell its story. Are you ready?
Fugitive Girls!

Further reading: Plan 9 Crunch, IMDb, AMC Film Critic and Yahoo.

You might also like: Cufflinks, Brass Buttons and Safety Pins.

Four Other Fugitive Girls
Patty Hearst
Bonnie Parker
Ma Barker
Lindsay Lohan

San Quentin, you've been livin' hell to me,
You've hosted me since nineteen sixty three.
I've seen 'em come and go and I've seen them die,
And long ago I stopped askin' why.


(Surprise link...click on it...I dare you!)


May 27, 2011

Okay, are you ready for your daily dose of whine? It was another horrific day at work. A stress-filled, rush job, nerve-jangling day. I was thinking about going the the Fortress of Papaya, but decided to just go home and have a few beers on my roof overhang outside of my apartment. I don’t go out there much and I really should. Everybody’s always jealous of it when they see it. Thinking about it brought back a memory I have of being out there and I thought I’d write that up tonight and illustrate it with real life pictures. So here goes!

On August 14th, 2003, it was a little after four in the afternoon and I was getting my shit together and getting ready to go into work. It was a  hot summer afternoon and my window unit air conditioner was humming away. I was walking over to turn it off and before I got there it stopped on its own. I tried to turn a lamp on and it didn’t turn on either. The power was off. I was running late for work, so I just walked out and locked my door.

Walking down the stairs, I ran into my neighbor Deloy.

“Hey Deloy, is your power off too?” I asked walking down the creaky stairs.

“Yeah, I think the whole building is out. Are you going to work?” She asked.

“Yeah, I’m running a little late, I’ll see you later,” I said as I headed for the front door.

“Okay, I’m sure the power will be back on when you get home,” She said as I opened the front door.

And now it can finally be revealed. It was Deloy that caused the widespread blackout on August 14th, 2003! When she uttered the words, “Okay, I’m sure the power will be back on when you get home,” she jinxed a large part of this country and Canada. It’s like when you say at work, “It looks like it’s going to be an easy day” and then the proverbial shit hits the old fan. I’m sorry to be the one to finally reveal this Deloy, but I could keep it a secret no longer. It was too much of a burden on my conscience. Look on the bright side though, you’ll probably make the NY Post tomorrow! I can already picture the headline: “DELOY: DAUGHTER OF DARKNESS!”

But anyway, back to the story!
So I went out and walked to 6th Avenue. And when I got there, there was tons of people on the street. I looked up and noticed the traffic lights weren’t working.

“Do you know what’s going on?” I asked a sweaty fat man in a brown suit.

“The electricity is out over the whole city,” he told me while sweat ran down his fat face. “My neighbor said she heard on the radio it was another terrorist attack.

“Oh fuck!” I said in response. “Well, listen take care of yourself," I said to him and started walking uptown to work. I didn’t know what else to do.

He wished me good luck as I headed uptown on 6th Avenue in a sea of people with worried-ass faces. My stomach was in knots. I did not want to go through another September 11th. I was walking as fast as I could and soon I was at work. A lot of my co-workers were standing out in the street. I saw my boss Mike and went up to him and asked if he knew what was going on. He explained it was a blackout that was not only in New York but in several other states as well. I was just relieved it wasn’t going to be another September 11th. He told me he heard it could last through the night and that I might as well go home. He also told me some people had no way to get home because of the train situation and might be stuck there all night.

And this is where I have to confess a bit of a selfish moment takes place. I started realizing people might start asking me to spend the night at my place since I live in the city. My apartment is tiny and it could turn into a mess if people were to start asking and it would be hard to turn people down. I told Mike I’d come back if the power came back on and walked right into Sam Wong and his wife, Hilda.

I had worked with Sam for years and he’s a friend of mine. He and Hilda live in Long Island and I knew they had no way to get home, because the trains weren’t running.

“Listen, I hate to ask this,” Sam said and I knew what was coming, “but we have nowhere to go. Can we stay at your place tonight.”

So what was I going to do? I told him they could and then said, “Let’s get the hell out of here, I can’t have twenty fucking people staying at my place. So we walked to my apartment. When we got to the corner of 16th and 6th I looked at the corner deli and my resources kicked in big time and I uttered five very important words: “We gotta get some beer!”

Sam and Hilda don’t drink booze, so they got some water and I bought three six packs of 16 ounce Budweisers. I’m always a firm believer of, it’s better to have more, than not enough! And so we went back to my apartment.

We walked in, put our bags down and it was hotter than a bonfire in hell in there. I instinctively walked over and tried to turn the air conditioner on.

“Unless that thing’s hooked up to a generator, I don’t think you’re going to have much luck with that,” Sam said, being a wise-ass.

“Listen, unless you want to sleep on the street, you better start kissing my ass!” I told him.

“Yeah, you’d like that wouldn’t you?” Sam shot back.

“Aw fuck you,” I said and I grabbed my beer to put it in the freezer.

I don’t defrost my freezer nearly enough...

See? But it worked in my favor that day, I knew it would keep my beer cold through the night. As you can see, I fall into survival of the fittest mode fastly!

So we opened my door that leads to the roof overhang so some air would come in. I walked over to my boombox and said, “I’m going to turn the radio on and see if we can hear some news.” Then I realized I didn’t have any batteries for it.

“We have to go get some batteries,” I said to Sam and Hilda.

“No batteries? Wow, you’re really prepared for an emergency situation here,” Sam said sarcastically.

“Hey fuck you, I’ve got more beer than anybody on this block right now, let’s go, it’ll give us something to do,” I shot back and we headed outside.

We got the batteries and were back in my apartment listening to the radio. I was drinking beer and it was boiling hot in there. We finally decided to go out and just take a walk. Walking around we found a pizza place that had a wood burning oven, so each got a slice and walked to Union Square park and ate it. There were a lot of people out and the mood was almost festive. I think a lot of people were like me and were just relieved it wasn’t some terrorist thing.

It started getting dark and before you knew it, New York looked like this!

Sam, Hilda and I headed back home and it was spooky walking in the pitch black New York night. The only things that were lit up on the streets were Mr. Softee trucks, they work on generators, and they were doing a booming business.

We made it back to my place and with the help of a cigarette lighter I found some candles and a flashlight, we lit them up and sat down, but the heat was stifling.

I’m going to go sit out on the roof,” I said getting up and taking a plastic chair with me to sit on.

Sam said he’d join me and Hilda said she just wanted to lay down. So we opened up my futon, I got her a pillow and Sam and I went outside. We brought a couple candles out and I set the flashlight at us so we wouldn’t be sitting in the pitch black night.

There’s a huge loft across from me and it was lit up with candles and I think a few flashlights. There were two people on the couch and they were making out.

“Looks like we might see some action!” I said to Sam.

“This is better than TV, hey look, channel 2,” Sam said pointing to another window lit up with candles. There were people inside and it looked like they were having a party in there.

I got up and got a beer and when I walked back out on to the roof, I looked over and saw a small window that was lit up and there was a woman standing in front of a mirror, messing around with her hair. She had light brown hair down to her shoulders, she was attractive, probably mid-twenties and she had on a pink halter top.

“Hey asshole,” I said to Sam, “check out channel 3!”

“Whoa!” Sam said eyeing the woman who was still posing in front of her mirror. “She’s pretty hot!”

“No shit,” I fired back. “She must have a portable light in there, it’s all lit up. She’s got a halter top on, if she takes that thing off we’ll see her tits!”

“Oh, shit!” Sam said kind of loudly.

It’s sad, but true, that two guys our age could be reduced to the mentality of a twelve-year-old boy looking at his first Playboy, at the thought of seeing some strange woman’s breasts. But what are you going to do?

When Sam said, “Oh, shit,” she looked out the window in our direction and immediately ran out of the room after she saw us leering at her. Seconds later she came back with a towel and covered the window up.

Sam eventually went to bed and I moved on to vodka, but that’s a whole different story and one too long to tell now.

The next day, Sam and Hilda left and went to Penn Station. The power was still off and I went out to get the chair off of the roof. I looked over at the window and the towel was down and you could see in again. I walked over and was staring at it and before I knew it, the woman was back in there and saw me staring at the window. She ran out of the room and there’s been a shade on the window ever since.

I still wish I could’ve seen her tits.

Further reading: CBS News, CNN, and the NY Times.

You might also like: Sam, Hilda and Marty.

Three Other Blackouts
1977 Backout
1965 Blackout
Blackout of Gretely

When the night has come,
And the land is dark,
And the moon is the only light we'll see.


(Surprise link...click on it...I dare you!)

Bonus Photo by Jason Kuffer!

Last week I went to the 11th Annual Joey Ramone Birthday Bash and ran into my friend Jason Kuffer there. Jason snapped a photo of me taking a picture and here it is.

To see more of Jason’s photos from the show click here: Jason Kuffer’s Photos From the Joey Ramone Birthday Bash. And here’s some backstage and after-party shots he snapped: More Jason Kuffer Photos. Great work, Jason, thanks for sending in the photo and links!


May 26, 2011

I really should quit whining about working the dayshift, but here we go again!

Today was almost a twelve hour day and I’m fucking beat. I feel like Monday’s and Tuesday’s post weren’t that great and I appreciate those of you who are sticking with me this week. It’s not only that I hate working and moving around in the daylight hours, it’s also that my workdays are a lot longer and I don’t feel like doing jack shit afterwards. So tonight, I’m taking a suggestion from MAD commenter and the future Jerry Lewis, Jason Hwang.

After I went to the shitty Tick Tock Diner (a diner without a counter!) he suggested I try the Skylight Diner which isn’t far from work. So that’s where I’m going tonight. This way if it sucks you can blame Jason.

Sadly I had to work late today, but the good news is at least it's dark outside and I'm staying true to the name of this blog.

This is Harold Camping's latest prediction, I don't think this act of heavenly division will happen. I'm calling it the, "Crapture."

And here we are, the Skylight Diner. Looks like an old school diner, nice!

And like all true NYC diners, it's open 24 hours.

Looks like they speak my language here!

And there's a nice curly-Q counter to sit at. Perfect!


Within three minutes of sitting down, an ice-cold Budweiser is placed before me. Aaahh, memories of where I work are fading fast.

And speaking of beers, check out the selection here. A large and varied list for a diner!

Ebony and Ivory condiment shot!

Here's some of the staff hard at work behind the counter. I've just placed an order for a bowl of matzo ball soup.

And I've also ordered a second beer. While we wait for the meal to arrive, let's take a little tour. Here's the back of the diner where there's table seating.

There's booths up in the front window for a nice view of the street as you eat.

I hear the desserts here are homemade and simply delectable!

Obligatory counter diner mirror shot!

Another shot of the other side of the counter...

And when I return to my seat, dinner is served! Their matzo ball soup is the best I've ever had, it not only has matzo balls, but there's noodles in it as well! Delicious!

I was tempted to have a black and white cookie for dessert, but opted for another beer instead.

And now it's out the door and home to collapse. See you tomorrow after dark and thanks to Jason for the suggestion!

If They Do Say So Themselves!
(From their “About Us” page on their website)
Welcome to Skylight Diner, servicing residents and businesses in Hell's Kitchen since 1996.

We are Teddy & George and we own and operate Skylight Diner. We're on hand every day to ensure that whether you come into our restaurant or order delivery, your food is prepared just the way you want it.

We offer value and speedy delivery. Choose from triple decker sandwiches, salads, pastas, Greek specialties, seafood entrees, pancakes, eggs and much, much more!

Skylight Diner

402 W. 34th St. (Near Ninth Ave.)

Further reading: New York Magazine, Skylight on flickr (be sure to look under the “Comments and faves” for a scary surprise!) and NY Times.

You might also like: John and Yoko.

Three Top Ten Lists

Famous Photographs
Psychological Thrillers
I Love My Job

Here come the daylight,
And now it’s the end.
Oh no, oh no, oh no.


(Surprise link...click on it...I dare you!)


May 25, 2011

First off I want to put up a link to the latest update from the Chillmaster Dance Party. Goggla posted her photos and a video! Check it out here: The Gog Log.

Okay, it’s Tuesday night, which means it’s the night I go out in search of the ever-elusive glass swizzle stick. The only problem this week is that I’m working the dayshift, so I have to do this shit when it’s still light out, so I can get home and get to sleep to get into work on time. I’ve decided to try the Gramercy Tavern, because it’s an upscale place, they must use swizzle sticks and it’s on my way home. So it’s off we go.

I really hate doing this in the daylight. Plus I was running late this morning, so I haven't showered today and haven't shaved since Sunday and I kind of look and smell like a hobo. I love the word, "hobo!"

Uh, oh, walking by this pile very quickly! Three words: Cardboard Box Man!

I love this vintage Squirt sign in Eisenberg's Sandwich Shop window!


Spinal Tap moment alert!

Oh if only this sign was located in a liquor store!

Jesus, this sign is scarier than the Cardboard Box Man!

Christ, here I am at the Gramercy Tavern and it's filled to the brim with after work people. I really miss my late night crowd. I can't drink in here.

And so it's home I go. This isn't a double gin and tonic, but those are real swizzle sticks, donated by "Boris!" Read more about them in the bonus section below! Goodnight everybody and I'll see you tomorrow in the stinking daylight once again. May this week pass quickly!

Further reading: New York magazine, Menu Pages, Open Table and Danny Meyer on YouTube.

You might also like: Walter, Cron and Kite.

Five Things I Hate About The Sunshine
It’s too bright.
It comes out in the daytime.
And I hate the daytime.
It’s a terrible Jonathan Edwards song.
It’s an even worse John Denver song.

My girlfriend's run off with my car,
And gone back to her ma and pa,
Telling tales of drunkenness and cruelty.


(Surprise link...click on it...I dare you!)

Bonus Swizzle Sticks and buttons from “Boris!”
MAD in-house artist, “Boris” sent in two swizzle sticks that are really something special. They’re authentic swizzle sticks from the Chicago Playboy Club! “Boris’s” Dad was a member and this is from his private stash. Thanks to “Boris” for this and for the buttons below.

Here they are, authentic swizzle sticks from the Playboy Club!

Very cool and a great addition to the collection.

"Boris" also sent along these vintage buttons, they're all great, but this one...

Is the greatest! A genuine Jerry Lewis Telethon button! Too cool! My dad's name is Jerry, which makes me one of Jerry's Kids and I've always been pissed I haven't seen a dime from that goddamned telethon! Thanks to "Boris" for this great package!

And here's the whole swizzle stick collection...aaaahhhhh! He's everywhere!