November 4, 2011

As you may or may not know, today is National Sandwich Day. A holiday I hold high in regard, because just like Dagwood Bumstead, I love sandwiches. They come in so many delicious varieties and styles you could eat a different sandwich every day of the year and never repeat yourself...hmm...I have to put that in my blog list of ideas! Anyway sandwiches run the gamut from a simple, yet satisfying ham and cheese on white bread to more inventive sandwiches like The Rubix Cubewich. Sandwiches rightfully deserve their own holiday.

You know one thing that’s always pissed me off? The Manwich advertising campaign that ran with the slogan, “A sandwich is a sandwich, but a Manwich is a meal.” Really Manwich? You’re a meal? I’m so glad you informed me of this nugget of information, because I’ve always thought you were a third-rate version of a Sloppy Joe. You look like diarrhea on a bun and that’s fitting since you taste like shit! You think you’re better than a sandwich? In actuality all you really are is a sauce for Sloppy Joe’s, it says so right there on your fucking label! But yet, you’re better than a sandwich? You’re nothing more than a fucking condiment masquerading as a meal. You’re a complete and utter fraud. It’s like Hunt’s Ketchup saying that they’re better than a cheeseburger. Quite frankly this whole charade makes me sick. Fuck you and the bun you rode in on, Manwich!

So anyway, I thought we’d celebrate National Sandwich Day by going somewhere and having a sandwich. I have to be honest here, I had to work late and it’s after one in the morning, so National Sandwich Day is officially over, but fuck it, I’m still awake, so I’m extending the goddamned holiday here on MAD. I thought about going to the Hollywood Diner, but then decided since we’ve already gone there, it would be better try a new spot. I Googled around and found a 24 hour diner/restaurant that’s on my way home called, The Chelsea Square Restaurant. And so, it’s off we go for a little sandwich celebration!

It's not that far away, but I thought I'd take a cab because it's late and my feet are killing me.

And here we are, The Chelsea Square Restaurant.

Open 24 hours, always the mark of excellence.

Inside there's rows of vanilla colored vinyl booths to sit at.

And on the outer perimeter there's tables with floor to ceiling windows giving you a view of the outside action on the street.

I chose to sit at the counter, as I usually do.

Jesse was working the counter area and happily served me up a beer. He told me the diner has been on the block for over 30 years.

I'm always fascinated with the photos in these places. Let's take a look at a few of them.

Here's a photo of Al Pacino with the caption reading: "Guess who's mincing onions in the Chelsea Square kitchen?" I guess he couldn't pay his bill that night. Should've taken the back end deal on The Godfather III, Al!

Here's a signed photo from Erik Estrada. I'm guessing he got the fish and CHiPs. Sorry about that.

And no true New York diner is complete without a cheesecake shot of Marilyn Monroe hanging over the counter.

And here's another one of Al Pacino. This one is signed, I wonder if he lives in the neighborhood?

Okay, time to look at the menu and figure out what sandwich to have to celebrate National Sandwich Day. I came to the right place as they have tons of sanwiches here. It was a rough decision...

But I decided on my favorite sandwich, a grilled cheese. But to jazz it up for the holiday, I got two kinds of cheese on the sandwich, cheddar and swiss and a slice of ham on rye bread. It looks delicious!

And it is. Happy National Sandwich Day, everyone!

Burp. And fuck you Manwich! Goodnight everybody and see you tomorrow after dark.

Chelsea Square Restaurant
368 W. 23rd St. (Near 9th St.)
212-691-5400

Further reading: Eat Some Sweets, The Guardian and Mealtime.

Twenty year old turkey in a thirty year old tin,
I can't wait until tomorrow, and thaw one out again.

(Surprise link...click on it...I dare you!)

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Cardboard Box Man Mutant Sighting By Ragin' RR!

MAD commenter, quote supplier and "rotgut 45" guzzler, ragin' rr, sent in this sighting of what looks like to be a mutant strain of a cheese cassette Cardboard Box Man. Aaaaahhh!

May 16, 2011

I got a nice shout-out on EV Grieve about my night out with the Chillmaster, check it out here: EV Grieve.

One thing I’ve been meaning to start featuring here on MAD is New York Diners. As noted at Jeremiah’s Vanishing New York, this is another of many things slowly vanishing in New York. I thought I should start documenting the ones left before they turn into a Starbucks or a Chipotle.

I had to work tonight, so I thought the first Diner I would feature here at MAD would be my neighborhood diner, The Hollywood Diner. I moved into my apartment on 16th street in 1998 and have been going to the Hollywood ever since I’ve moved in. I’m not sure how long its been on the block, but I know its been there quite a while. It’s friendly, the waiters, hostesses and counter workers are all friendly and the food is great with tons of selections. And it’s open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. And it’s just a half a block from where I live. So let's go already!

It's just 14 blocks from where I work, but I've got overtime money, so we'll take a cab and arrive in style.

And we're off!

And here we are at the Hollywood Diner. As you can see, there's outside dining, but it's a little chilly out so let's go inside.

Here's the main dining room...

But I think we'll sit at the counter tonight.

Florencio is the host tonight and he happily serves up an Amstel Light. Cheers and beers!

Okay, I'm all settled in and it's time to order.

Of course since it's the Hollywood Diner, there's a few celebrity sandwiches on the menu. My favorite is the Al Pacino. Attica!

The service is great here and before you know it, the food starts arriving.

I started out with a cup of Matzo Ball soup. I loaded it up with pepper and it was delicious!

And here's the main course, a grilled cheese sandwich. I think that's the perfect diner dinner, matzo ball soup and a grilled cheese sandwich. The grilled cheese is rye bread and cheddar cheese.

And it was delicious!

The ceiling of the Hollywood Diner has a nice mural of clouds on it.

A photo of Elvis hangs on the front wall.

They love Lucy in here.

See!

Speaking of Al Pacino, here he is as Scarface next to 007.

And no self-respecting Hollywood Diner would be complete without a picture of Marilyn Monroe hanging on the wall.

And finally...cake! Goodnight everybody and see you tomorrow after dark.

Hollywood Diner
574 Sixth Ave. (@16th St.)
212-295-3850

Further reading: Jeremiah’s Vanishing New York, New York magazine, facecrack and Meghan Hickey Photography.

You might also like: Peter, Paul and Mary.

Five Hollywood Icons
Marilyn Monroe
Clark Gable
Mae West
Paul Newman
Briget Bardot

Avoid steppin on Bela Lugosi,
Because he’s liable to turn and bite.

ARCHIVES

(Surprise link...click on it...I dare you!)

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Bonus Link!

My friends Karen and Jon from Grade “A” Fancy have been asked to be part of the reading series, Drink, Think. If you’re in the area June 15th, you should go cheer them on. Check out the information here: Drink[dot]Think.