Entries in Sob (1)

Tuesday
Mar152011

March 15, 2011

Papaya King @1:07 am
Upper East Side

Okay, it’s Monday evening and if you’ve been following this blog, you know what that means—The Papaya Wars continue! Tonight I’m traveling to the Upper East Side. There’s a Papaya King up there and I read on Grub Street that it got a makeover last September. Grub Street reported that there’s vintage photos in here and one of Anthony Bourdain in the hotdog house. So it’s off to Papaya number five, to see how they fare. Oh, and I hope you realize that the Papaya Wars are brought to you exclusively via MAD, you won’t find this reporting anywhere else. And yeah, I know it’s because I’m making the whole thing up, but still, it sounds good. Right?

I had to work late tonight, it's almost one in the morning and a little deserted outside on this Monday night.

We'll catch a cab out here on 6th, I'm tired and want to get this shit over with can't wait to start this fun evening of mayhem and hot dogs.

And here we are headed to the Upper East Side, we'll be there in minutes.

Wow, this looks like a good Papaya!

I love their neon, let's go get a dog, I'm in the mood for this all of a sudden!

The hot dog pictures look inviting, but the door is locked, what's going on here?

This fellow told me through the glass that they were closed. Closed? Papayas never close. This is sad news, indeed!

And it's a shame, this looks like a first-class Papaya King...except it's closed.

You may be the original, but you go to bed too early, Papaya King. What about all of us late-shift workers who long for a dog at one in the morning?

I wish I could back this boast up...but you're closed!

One last ebony and ivory, ketchup and mustard photo. Shot through the window. So close...but yet so far away. Sob!

Lets see if there's anything else open, this whole neighborhood is kind of dead.

Sheesh! This is the only all-night hot doggery on the block open all night. This is my cue...

To get back in a cab...

To come home and say hello to my little friends. Goodnight everybody and see you after dark.

Okay, I got home and did some research. I found out from a review in New York magazine that they close at midnight on weekdays and are only open till two in the morning on weekends! What kind of a sorry-ass Papaya King is this? I thought they all were open 24 hours. Well, it certainly doesn’t bode well for their rating in the Papaya Wars, here’s the new numbers. As always the rankings go from worst to the best.

5. Papaya King on the Upper East Side, I have no clue what this place is like because they close at midnight. They may be the original and the oldest in Manhattan, but still, they should be up all night to wage war against the 7-11 down the street. Come on, those clowns are selling hot dogs all night, where’s your fighting spirit, Papaya King? You disappoint me, sadden me and now I’m crying Papaya tears. They’re tasty!
4. Hell’s Kitchen Papaya, because it’s not there anymore.
3. Chelsea Papaya, it’s clean, people were nice in there, but there’s no beer.
2. Gray’s Papaya on the Upper West Side, it brings back good memories and the signage is nice, but there’s no beer here and I don’t know if I’ll ever get that horrible taste of the papaya drink out of my mouth or mind.
1. Penn Station Papaya...they’ve got beer!

Last night I Twittered about this cruel and bitter Papaya moment, and the Papaya King took note. Here’s the Tweet’s.

I posted a twitpic of the closed hotdog hut.

They replied with this Tweet.

And so, the dance begins! I'll let you know on further updates.

If they stay true to their word and stay open later, I’ll pay them a return visit and maybe their rating will improve. I’m nothing but fair...in the Papaya Wars!

Stay tuned to see who wins in the ratings of the Papaya Wars only here on MAD!

Papaya King
179 E. 86th St. (Near Third Ave.)
212-369-0648


Further reading: New York Magazine, Time Out New York, Eater and A Fine Blog.

Some Things I Did Before Work Today
Listened to Joan Jett’s Greatest Hits.
Read some news items about Japan.
Got freaked out.
Drank a bottle of diet Mountain Dew.
Obsessively checked my blog stats.
Combed my hair in a thousand ways.
But I came out lookin’ just the same.

Nightcap

We won't follow or imitate,
We can break away.

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