April 5, 2011
One of my favorite blogs is Jeremiah's Vanishing New York. It's an insightful and knowledgeable blog about New York's ever-changing landscape. Today I'm honored to have a guest entry and photos there. Check it out here: Back To Show Follies.
Okay, time for another battle royale in the Papaya Wars! For those of you keeping track, and I know in my delusional mind that there’s plenty of you out there keeping score, this will be battle number eight. Last week we saw the original Papaya King dramatically jump from last place all the way to the first place position in the all-important standings. Tonight, my Canadian friend Lex has requested that I try the one near the Port Authority bus station in Times Square. She and her in-laws, Morley and Mary Ann made a stop here during their visit last summer after attending a party at the Rum House hosted by Karen and Jon from Grade “A” Fancy. And so, with a bullet in my front pocket, let the battle begin, Barney Fife style, like I even know what all this means.
It's closing in on midnight, I had to work later than usual and i'm a little beat. We'll walk straight up 9th Avenue, 12 blocks to 42nd Street and get this shit over with let the battle begin!
This fellow was trimming flowers outside of a 9th Avenue deli and posed for a photo.
The Papaya Dog on 42nd Street. Let the battles begin...KHAAAAN!
Let's go in and check it out.
Lots of dogs on the grill, but I opted out for a corn dog...
And this fellow served it up. There weren't any large containers of mustard (so much for the patented ebony and ivory shot, strike one) but he offered up this behind the counter container.
And here it is in all its mustardized glory.
I took a large bit and discovered it's barely warm, in fact it's borderline cold. Ecch.
Fuck! I forgot the vodka, no patented Screwdapaya this week. This drink is sickeningly sweet. Let's take a look around here.
The menu hangs on the back wall.
They are the first Papaya place I've seen that serves fish and chips.
They also have a cracked window which can only lead to...obligatory cracked window shot!
This sign reminds me of the fact I forgot the vodka. They really know how to twist the old knife in here. I think it's time to leave.
Am I paranoid or is this truck staring at me? Goodnight everybody and see you tomorrow after dark.
---------------------------------------------
This Week's Papaya Wars Standings. As always the rankings go from worst to the best.
7. Hell’s Kitchen Papaya: Because it’s not there anymore.
6. Papaya Dog in Times Square: They don’t have beer and I forgot to bring vodka. Plus my corn dog was borderline cold and they have a cracked window in there which can only mean bad luck to all who enter.
5. Chelsea Papaya: It’s clean, people were nice in there, but there’s no beer.
4. Gray’s Papaya on the Upper West Side: It brings back good memories and the signage is nice, but there’s no beer here and I don’t know if I’ll ever get that horrible taste of the papaya drink out of my mouth or mind.
3. Papaya Dog at 14th and 1st: The staff is super-friendly, it’s clean and the hot dogs are great there. However, they robbed me of my patented Ebony and Ivory ketchup and mustard shot! War is hell.
2. Penn Station Papaya: They’ve got beer!
1. Papaya King on the Upper East Side: They’ve got vodka...okay, you’ve got to bring it yourself and sneak it in, but still, this is the original Papaya King in New York City. They've been in the same spot on this block since 1932. The Beatles ate here on their first trip to New York when they appeared on the The Ed Sullivan Show. So does this put the King in first place for now? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Papaya Dog
578 9th Ave. (@42nd St.)
212-629-0632
Further reading: Tomas Fano on Flickr, Active Diner, Urban Spoon and Smoking Hot Waitress.
---------------------------------------------
The Papaya Dialogues
Last week the King chimed in on Twitter about being in first place.
Glad you're honored King, you're still at the top of the list. We'll see what happens next week! Only on...The Papaya Wars!
---------------------------------------------
Seven pictures of real dogs in hot dog buns and outfits floating around on the internet.
Tiny Hot Dog
Three Hot Dogs in a Race
Solitary Hot Dog
Panting Hot Dogs
Hot Dog Humiliaton
A Somewhat Sad Hot Dog
Ebony and Ivory Hot Dogs
Suddenly, the sun broke through,
I turned around she was gone.
32 Comments
Reader Comments (32)
I liked that post from Jeremiah, venturing down the stairs to the old porn movie house. Old seedy NY is still around, just gotta look hard for it. Cowsills song was originally called "The flower girl", though I prefer "We Can Fly", underrated group and surviving members still touring, they really sound good. Wonder what those guys at Papaya dog do to kill time,,,certainly not keep products hot.
i hate weener dogs..
only dog that drives me nuts..
they yap and when you grab to catch them they can contort and bite you hard enough that ten years later they you still have a scar!
and the ones with hair are strange little cousin it wannabees.
oh wait i am afraid of german shepards.. ok deaf and blind ones.. they bite too.
really hard.
hard enough to get a dog put in quarantine.
and ugly ass stiches on my leg
maybe that is why i eat hot dogs..
rebelling against mean dogs.
wont eat at places with broken windows.. it's a phobia i have.
and i was grumpy enough yesterday i'd have taken that cold corn dog.. and well never mind:)
there was one in astoria, steinway st. and 30th ave., which is now, of course, bank of america.
i've always preferred the gray's papaya in the uws and west village -- 8th street and sixth ave. those have felt like "authentic" papaya 'dogs to me -- if it's selling burgers and knishes, and fish and chips, and whatnot, other than hotdogs, i've always considered it not 'authentic. also, the 'dogs should only have condiments of mustard, sauerkraut, onions, or ketchup to go with the 'dogs. if a 'papaya' joint has relish, cheese, peppers, chili, etc. as a choice for a condiment, i don't consider it a "papaya authentic". not even the one in the 86th st. ues one, even though it was the original.
then again, what really is an "authentic papaya 'dog. i suppose that's the same for what is the "authentic" ray's pizza. is it original ray's? famous original ray's? ray's?... i was gonna do a photo catalog of all the "ray's" pizza in all 5 boroughs, but got lazy/tired after i've visited the third one. i think that would be a good next project for 'marty after dark' venture.
nonetheless, i'd rather see these papaya 'dog joints, rather than a fro-yo or cupcake joints, or banks or pharmacies. these papaya 'dog establishments give the nyc character, what's remaining of it. apologies for the long-winded comment.
OK, I'll be the first asshole to point out that unless MAD borrowed Mr. Peabody's Wayback Machine, this Papaya battle should be listed under April 5th, not March 5th. I also think it would be nice if someone bought this poor blogger a decent Papaya Vodka flask.
@Al: It was a lot of fun getting those photos for Jeremiah's blog and an honor for me to be a guest star there! You're right about the Cowsills, a great band. Susan Cowsill went on to sing with Dwight Twilley.
@Gidgie: We'd all love to know about you and what you'd have done with the corn dog!
@esquared: Excellent idea about the Ray's places! I will do it after the Papaya Wars are over in a couple weeks. It'll be a Battle Rayale! You'll have to join me on it at one of the stops. I'll let you know when it starts. Thanks for the idea!
@csp: Thanks for seeing the date error, eagle eyes! I just corrected it. And yes, any incoming flasks would be welcomed indeed!
Nah I'd just have asked for another one...
really.......
reposted the FB link ...
sorry if anyone tried to click after Marty fixed the date!
sorry if anyone clicked like...
gonna go make a hotdog for lunch now:)
@Gidgie: Thanks for fixing the link, sorry about the mixup! Put some mustard on your dog!
@ MAD; No vodka....NO VODKA?!?!?! NNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
@ Gidge; you probably already know how I feel about dachshunds from previous posts...here's another tale from my boyhood concerning Cedric the Homicidal Jonsonville brown and serve sausage dog. One day, my mother had told me to vacum the stairwell in our house, and the moment I turned the portable vacume cleaner on the damn dog immediately started making a royal pain in the ass of himself...he absolutely HATED that vacum cleaner. After a while, I got sick and tired of Cedric's yapping and snarling and trying to bite the vacume cleaner hose, so I started waving it in his face and drove the little fucker into a frenzy. Then, I hit the off switch and dropped the hose to the floor. "Dead snake Cedric...dead snake...get the dead snake..." I crooned to our dachshund.as he poked and sniffed around the vacum cleaner hose. Then...and I was waiting for this...Cedric stuck his nose right into the end of the vacum cleaner hose for a sniff, and I hit the on button. Cedric's nose was sucked right in to the end of the hose, his tail stuck staight out, his eyes bulged and you could hear his tongue flapping inside of the hose in a kind of doggie rasberry while every hair on his back stood on end. After I had somewhat recovered from my laughing fit, I cut Cedric a break and turned off the vacume cleaner, and Cedric pulled his nose out of the hose...and had a total canine rage seisure. He wasn't just barking at the vacume cleaner...he was bellowing at it, he'd forgotten how to bark properly in his apoplectic rage. I was rolling on the floor with tears in my eyes while the dog was pitching a fit trying to bite through the metal hide of the vacum cleaner when ma came in and told me to shut the damn dog up and lock him in the bathroom..."What the hell did you do to him THIS time you little jerk?" was all she had to say to me before she stormed out of the room, but I was laughing to hard to give her a proper answer. True story.
One word for that corn doggie, GROSS! What a shame you had no vodka! Better luck next week. And I've always loved that Cowsills song, great find!
P.S. Nice work over at Jeremiahs blog! I've gone there ever since he did the 365 interview with you, it's a great New York blog!
I think Marty should start doing coffee reviews. It would be a cool to see someone who doesn't like coffee, start drinking it, then going out and giving pointers to all of us coffee lovers.
@GENE By your logic, MAD should eventually review OB/GYNs. Come to think of it, that would be fun.
On a different note, I thought I would leave this here.
There's nothing worse than a cold corndog. Everything separates and it leaves that waxy film on your tongue and shit. Blech! On the upside, apparently you can get an order of fries for .99 of a cent. So, that's cool! TO TYPOS!
@JAWS: That's amazing. My dog is having issues with the washing machine at the moment. She also hates the vacuum cleaner.
@Marty: My NY corndog experience was also cold.
Long live the King!
@GENE: Good idea, but I don't think it's going to happen!
@csp: Love that linkage!
@Biff: Nothing is worse than a cold corn dog...well...maybe cold coffee. Too Tipos!
@Clacky of Bunt's Downunder: I thought about you when I chomped into that. And yes, Long live the King!
@ Clacky; Cedric the dachshund had issues with everyone and everything, he had delusions of grandeur and was mad at the world. He was a genuine canine psychopath. Maybe it was we thought giving a German dog a British name would be funny...apparently it gave the dog a complex, I don't know.
If you told him to shut up, he'd give you this 'Oh...you...did...not' look, then he'd hide under the couch for hours and growl and snap at the ankles of anyone that walked past the couch. Miserable mutt.
Loved your guest spot on Vanishing New York!! This combines two of my favorite blogs. Snooping around is always fun, though I had a run-in with a K9 officer & dog last week when I asked too many questions!
Nasty, nasty corn dog. You have to get to the 8th St. Gray's Papaya!
catshup yucky.. mustard gooooooooddddddddd
i love grey poup on everything cause i like saying grey poup.
@jaws.. should have sucked the little fucker up...
my dog gretsch ate cords.. cost me a fortune to have everything re corded..
once she attacked the lawnmower.. pulled the lawnmower boy right off it..
it was my excuse to not vaccuum
@Gidget: What's with dogs and their erratic behaviour around common household appliances? It wouldn't kill my dog to assume that since the vacuum or washing machine hasn't attacked her in the time since we've had these things that they're not biding their time. Funny creatures.
@onemorefoldedsuset: What's the cross street for the 8th avenue Papaya? I'll go there next week. Glad you liked the post over at Jeremiah's, it was a lot of fun to do and I was thrilled I got the photos. Those people are really nuts! And what's the K9 story?
Loved Jeremiah's post, great secret investigating. Beautiful roses! That's one of those things you miss out on living in a small town. Just another reason for me not to like corn dogs. My son is going to love the Mad List!
@kari: Yep, corn dogs can be dicey. Glad you liked the Jeremiah post!
Not only is the truck staring at you, I think the Bicycle Lane has eyes for you too.
Great story over at "JVNY"
Nice slealth work Daddio!
STEALTH work. Damn uneditable posts!
INRE to the staring truck. Is it just me or are all the new environmentally friendly bicycle lanes just civic masturbation? Spend a lot of money to further congest overly crowded streets to make a dedicated bicycle lane in the midst of downtown traffic. That street you were afraid to drive down in a car, now ride down it on your bike. I guess long term the city will make its money back in moving violation fees, bicycle permit fees, improper helmet fees, and funniest of all, non-compliant bicycle "ringer" fees. When something is "Green" are they referring to environmentally friendly or fiscally predatory?
@"Boris:" Ha ha ha! I thought something else was looking at me!
@off topic guy: Sadly, I think the answer is fiscally predatory.
Great. Now I'm craving a corn-dog. There goes my diet!
I have to say I have been eating more dogs (hot dogs! hot dogs) since you started this series. The cold corn dog is such an affront that I would have considered ranking it lower than the vanished Hell's Kitchen Papaya!
Also, I am a huge fan of that UFO 907 truck. It sure gets around! Mostly I see it in the East Village though
They really should sell BEER! What is a hot dog without beer?!
@Meleah: Just don't get one at this place!
@Handel: I've never seen the truck before. Maybe it's EV Lambo's cousin!
@Tiki Bar Susie: A hot dog without beer brings a tear to my eye!
8th Street & 6th Avenue. But I just read today that they're also selling dollar pizza slices, which is not good. The K9 malarkey was all because of the office desk on the Roosevelt Island subway platform!
@onemorefoldedsunset: Oh, I thought you meant 8th Avenue. I don't live from there so that will be next week's stop. When will this dollar pizza madness end?